CONSIDERATIoNS A YOUNG LADY SHOUlD MAKE WHEN CHOOSING A HUSBAND

Question: What are the most important considerations a young lady should make when choosing a husband? If she refuses someone simply for economic or worldly reasons, will that expose her to the punishment of Allaah?

Response: The most important attributes that a woman must look for in selecting a husband are character and piety. Wealth and lineage are secondary considerations. The most important aspect is that the proposed groom be a person of piety and proper behavior. The person of proper behaviour and piety will not do his wife wrong. Either he will keep her in a way that is proper or he will leave her to go free in the best way.

Furthermore, the person of religion and behavior may be a blessing for her and her children. She may learn manners and religion from him. If he does not have those characteristics, she should stay away from him, especially if he is one of those who is lax with respect to performing the prayers or if he is known to drink alcohol, may Allaah save us. As for those who never pray, they are disbelievers. Believing women are not permissible for them nor are they permissible for the believing women. The important point is that the woman should stress character and piety. If he is also of a noble lineage, that is to be preferred. This is due to the Messenger of Allaah’s (sal-Allaahu `alayhe wa sallam) statement:

«If a person whose religion and character you approve of comes to you, then marry him».

However, if he is also suitable [in other ways, such as economics standing and so forth], that is better.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen | Fataawa al-Mar’ah | Published: 18 October 1999